Following God, Not Momma

I have debated several weeks now on rather or not to write this post and last night decided I would in hopes of maybe helping / encouraging someone else who may be facing this same issue.

You see, a month or so ago Sydney and I were talking casually about clothes, hair and stuff. You know casual girl talk. Then out of the blue she said "what do you think about head coverings?" What do I think about head coverings? Yeah, head coverings. I laughed a little and said you mean like Amish type things? I guess I have never taught about them, why? Then it came..."do you think we should wear them?" Well... obviously I don't think we should or we would.

Then I go for it and ask "why, do you think we should"? All is silent and finally after what seemed like an eternity she says she does. How could this be? We have never discussed the need for them, I had never worn them, and no one we know wears them except for one family at church. I have to admit I was a little stunned that this had even been going through her mind. The more we talked that night the deeper the conversation got and the more I could see she had really been studying this out. Now most of the time I take great pride in the fact that I have taught my children to dig deep, find out what they need to know and to always seek the truth via the Bible but that night seemed different. How could she be going into this on her own? How could she be developing convictions like this....without me?

Let me be clear I have never had an issue with head coverings but all of a sudden I felt like I did. For days Syd and I talked about why I did not think they were needed and why she felt they were; I must say the whole time she stayed open minded and very sweet spirited about it. I could truly tell she wanted to do what God wanted. We used the Bible and concordance as our first source for information since as Christians that is our authority. After about a week we both agreed to study it out, pray about it and talk again after a week or so. We also both agreed to try and keep an open mind and see the issue from all aspects. I began searching the web, talking to our pastor’s wife and even bought a sermon on head coverings. I prayed constantly for God to show Syd why I was right and she was wrong and to allow her to be persuaded by what I had found.

After a week or so we got back together on the issue, I just knew she would see my points, did she? NO! We finally agreed to talk to Scott and that as the head of the house if he was ok with it I would not say any thing else about it. I just knew he would see MY point of view. Did he? NO! I was shocked, how could he say it was a choice she had to make? I was so frustrated and could not understand why God had not answered my prayer. Why had he not made her see MY point of view and now Scott too?

Scott agrees with me that the Bible teaches a woman's covering is her hair but could see from Syd studying why she thought it could be interrupted as a covering of cloth not hair and that if Syd truly felt like God was calling her to wear them we should not stop her. He felt as if we would do more harm in trying to make her agree on something that is truly a non issue in his eyes. Later he asked me why I was so bothered when this was really nothing that could injure her, it was not unscriptural or bad for her to wear them and he could find no reason to stop her and I truly didn't have a reason either other than it was not needed, that was what her hair was for. I could not answer him with anything reasonable and his question left me feeling puzzled with myself.

Well a few days later I was reading my Bible and started praying to See God's will in a another situation and was suddenly hit with the fact that I never sought Gods Will in the head covering, only MY point of view. When praying about it I wanted what I wanted, not what God wanted for her. After a lot of prayer I realized I was not bothered by the head coverings I was bothered that Sydney is growing up and seeking God's will and that God's will for her may not always be mine. She sought God before me and that is what I want but it was hard to deal with it actually happening. More than anything I have always wanted my kids to seek God, to have a relationship with him and to strive to do His will in their lives. I honestly felt like a failure when I realized how bad I had blown it over something as simple as a head covering, and then I remembered that Gods grace is for the big and small failures in my life and that God brings these things about often to teach us things and make us more CHrist like.

What I learned: First and foremost to humble myself and seek God's will not my own in all things! I still do not feel that I need wear a cloth covering but I am truly at peace with the fact that Sydney does, I have even helped her choose some fabric, find patterns and sew some.

Please note this post is not meant to convince anyone to or not to wear coverings. You can find lots of info on the web about them including outlines that you can cross reference with your Bible. This post is simply to share my experience. If you are struggling with rather or not to wear them and are under your parents authority go to them. I can not stress this enough. Through out this Sydney kept a very humble, meek and obedient heart about the issue. She continuously shared what she had found but always said I will do what ever you and dad decided is best for me. If you are struggling with different convictions from your child seek God humbly and ask him what He wants for your child and be ready to accept it.

Lastly, just to be clear Scott and I would never give in on something that would harm our children or was clearly unbiblical.